Whenever you have any need to speak about money in your
presentation here is a simple gag that always gets a good laugh.

It looks like you printed money

Brand new One Dollar Bills
Padding Glue
Two small boards
Two C Clamps or some bricks

Basically you are making a pad of money so you can tear a bill
off the pad. The top edge of the pad is red or green which gives
the impression that is was printed like a tablet. The color of
the edge is simply the color of the glue you use to make the pad.

I say “Email marketing is just like printing
money. In fact, I just printed some [show the pad of bills]. They
look really good don’t they?” [tear a few off and give them to
audience members] . . . Then I say, “That’s because they are.”
Then I briefly explain that I just padded some up with printer’s
glue. Usually you get a little laughter at this point. Then I go
for the big laugh line.

I say, “You should see the look on the bellman’s face when I tip
him.” [gets big laugh] You could substitute waiter or waitress
for bellman if it’s more appropriate.

Just after I deliver the above line about the bellman I hold up
one of the bills with a quizzical look on my face (like the
bellman would have). I then mention something about the bellman
getting out the pen used by cashiers to tell if money is

Go to the bank and get about 50 brand new, crisp one dollar

Make sure the bills are lined up with each other perfectly.
Sandwich the bills between two small, straight boards. The top
edge of the bills should align with the edge of the boards.
Clamp the boards together with C Clamps, or put some heavy bricks
on them. Brush on a few layers of printer’s glue (purchase
from print supply house or borrow some from your local printer .
. . you could have your friendly printer do the entire padding
process for you if you want.)

Let it dry and you’ve got yourself a gag that you can use for 10
to 20 presentations depending on how many bills you give out at

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