=>What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? Sanka.

=>Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID
that he just whipped out a quarter?

=>Daylight savings time – why are they saving it and where do
they keep it?

=>An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The
older she gets the more interested in her he is.

=>”Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons.”
–Popular Mechanics, 1949

=>”I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.”
–Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943

=>What is it about management? I work for myself and even MY boss
is an idiot.

=>What do Martin Luther King Jr., George Washington, and Abe
Lincoln all have in common?   They were all born on holidays

=>I always wanted to be a procrastinator, but never got around to

=>Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and
I thought to myself, “Where the heck is the ceiling?!”

=>My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
-Ashleigh Brilliant

=>Man is a peculiar creature. He spends a fortune making his home
insect-proof and air-conditioned, and then eats in the yard.

=>How do you drive an accountant completely
insane?   Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him
and fold up a road map the wrong way.

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